When we go shopping in a clothes shop, a short skirt can be very good to show off our figure, but when we look at ourselves in the mirror, we start to worry whether the skirt is too short, whether it is too tight, is it comfortable when going upstairs, will everyone look at me ……Various thoughts prompted us to take off the short skirts and move on to these more ordinary and modest clothes.
Virtually all of us are beautiful, but the way we look in the mirror represents all sorts of judgmental voices from the outside world, feeling the presence of the male gaze.
The male gaze does not stand alone, but can be seen as part of a wider societal context that perpetuates the patriarchal system and entrenches gender differences between men and women. Society values men for their social characteristics, their jobs, their studies, their careers, but women for their physical characteristics, how they look, how they are built.
Today’s male gaze is more than just silent admiration; most of it comes in the form of actual action. “It’s not about seeing a girl on the street and complimenting her appearance; it’s about further discussing whether the girl has a good body or not, as well as more nasty thoughts.”
- Aren’t you wearing such a revealing dress just for us to see?
- What’s the point of a woman’s job? Just take care of the family.
- ……
Why do women always feel a strong sense of insecurity in today’s public places, where the male gaze is accompanied by aggressive behaviour?
For men, the female gaze may give them inexplicable confidence, but for women, the male gaze is like a snake lurking in the depths of darkness, always full of danger.
Because men and women are in different positions in society and understand things from different perspectives, men and women can never have true empathy, and men can’t understand the pressure women feel in this environment, which is a kind of invisible violence.
It is hoped that all women will move up the career ladder, unencumbered by social constraints, free from imposed labels, and become independent and successful in our own right, living for ourselves.
Reference
Glapka, Ewa. “‘If You Look at Me like at a Piece of Meat, Then That’s a Problem’ – Women in the Center of the Male Gaze. Feminist Poststructuralist Discourse Analysis as a Tool of Critique.” Critical discourse studies 15, no. 1 (2018): 87–103.
You’re absolutely correct to relate the male gaze to violence. The number of horrific encounters and stories we hear/read/see of women and girls being treated horribly by men for the sake of male gratification is truly saddening. Why should we feel scared walking down the street day OR night? Why do we have to second guess what we wear just to avoid harassment? It’s rather exhausting having to always look over our shoulders at every given moment.
All this invisible violence really adds a lot of stress to women’s lives, and it’s really scary to think about whether or not we’re dressing safely and whether or not we’re doing the right thing at all times！