Who Are We Online?

Constructing Identity in the Digital World


In today’s world, our identities aren’t just about who we are offline. They’re also shaped by how we show up online. Social media allows us to explore and present different sides of ourselves, and with every post, story, and interaction, we’re creating versions of ourselves.

But this flexibility also raises questions:

How much of what we share is “real,” and how much is carefully curated?


Shaping Digital Identity

“A status, a position, a social place is not a material thing to be possessed and then displayed; it is a pattern of appropriate conduct, coherent, embellished, and well-articulated.”

Goffman, 1959: 75

This idea also connects to impression management, where we control our perception. According to Goffman, we use “setting, appearance, and manner” to create impressions. On Instagram, my setting is the carefully chosen photo; my appearance is styled, and my manner is thoughtful. On TikTok, the setting is casual, the appearance is more natural, and the manner is light-hearted, creating an authentic impression to match the vibe of that platform.

Different platforms often bring out different sides of us. For example, I use Instagram to share highlights of my life beautiful photos, exciting events, or cool places I visit. It’s where I present a polished version of myself. In contrast, on TikTok, I’m more unfiltered, sharing funny or random moments that feel truer to my everyday personality. This aligns with sociologist Erving Goffman’s presentation of self-theory, which suggests that we “perform” different versions of ourselves based on the context and audience. Instagram becomes my “front stage,” where I put forth a curated image, while TikTok feels more like the “backstage,” where I can be spontaneous and let my humour show.


The Benefits and Challenges of Digital Identity

Digital spaces allow people to explore their identities in ways that might feel restricted offline. Social media provides a space to express different sides of us and connect with others who relate to those aspects. For many, especially those in marginalised communities, these spaces can provide a sense of belonging and the freedom to explore identity in ways that may not feel possible in their everyday lives. However, there are challenges. Platforms like Instagram can create a highlight reel effect, where we’re constantly comparing our real lives to everyone’s polished versions. Research shows that these comparisons can negatively impact mental health, especially among younger users. It’s easy to feel that everyone else’s life looks perfect, even though we know it’s just one side of the story. Influencers highlight this tension between “authentic” and “curated.” They often share aspirational and relatable moments to create a well-rounded yet curated brand. This mix makes their digital identity engaging, but it’s important to remember that even the “real” moments are often carefully staged.


Finding Balance

To maintain a healthy digital identity, it helps to remember that what we see online is only part of the story. Practising digital literacy can help us avoid the comparison trap by recognising that online personas are curated differently.

Conclusion

Our digital identities are a mix of real and performed aspects shaped by the unique nature of each platform. As we navigate these spaces, staying aware of the gap between actual and curated can help us enjoy social media while staying true to ourselves.


Bibliography

  • Goffman, E. (1959). The presentation of self in everyday life. Anchor Books.
  • Marwick, A. E. (2013). Status update: Celebrity, publicity, and branding in the social media age. Yale University Press.

3 thoughts on “Who Are We Online?

  1. Hello! Thanks for sharing! Your application of Goffman’s “self-presentation” theory to different social platforms is very enlightening. I have some new perspectives that I hope will expand our thinking about digital identity.
    You mentioned that different platforms bring out different “selves”, which made me think about whether this existence of multiple identities leads to some kind of “psychological separation”? For example, the difference between the “ideal self” displayed on Instagram and the more authentic self on the TikTok may lead to invisible confusion about self-perception. Does the separation of digital identities affect our identity in real life? For example, when we show our “perfect” selves on Instagram for a long time, will it gradually affect our self-expectations in real life? What psychological effects do you think this separation of digital identities may have?
    You also mentioned that social media can be a space for self-expression, especially for marginalized groups, which is indeed a positive aspect of social media. At the same time, you also gave a critical side, which is very thought-provoking. However, I would like to explore further that this “digital identity” may also reinforce social pressure. For example, marginalized groups seek a sense of identity on social media, but they may feel the need to constantly maintain this “online image” due to the influence of likes and followers. Marwick (2013)also pointed out that this pressure for digital identity allows users to express themselves while also being driven by the platform’s traffic mechanism. Do you think there is a cycle of pressure in this environment, where people feel increasingly constrained by digital identities when expressing themselves?

    1. Hi, thanks for commenting!
      I hadn’t really thought about how keeping different “selves” on platforms could cause “psychological separation,” but that makes a lot of sense. Posting a so-called perfect self on Instagram might start to affect how we see ourselves in real life, and it could create pressure to live up to that ideal image even offline. I totally agree about the pressure side, too. Social media can be a great space for expression, but the need for likes and followers can make people feel they must keep up a certain image. It’s like a form of validation that feels good but can also trap you into maintaining that identity.

      Thank you, made me really made me think more deeply about the topic.

  2. hi! firstly, I absolutely enjoyed reading your blog 🙂
    I love how you compared the presentation of yourself on two different digital platforms (TikTok and Instagram), I find that so relatable. Through your blog, I thought deeply on the part played by each social media app which relates to how a user may present themselves. Such as TikTok having a “casual” setting, or Twitter (X) being very unfiltered which causes one to create their appearance and “aesthetic” to fit the atmosphere created in the app. This further demolishes our “real self” and adds more onto the “idealised self” we fabricate in order to fit in or look ”perfect.” I definitely agree with your conclusion, we all need to be aware of what is created in digital media to who we really are. As this is what will allow a healthier state of mine and relationship with social media. Well done on the blog!

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